Living In Reverse II

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After months of observing more improvements to my physical health, I am ready to share. For continuity from the previous post, the title is Living In Reverse II. This means that the improvements are such that my health state has been restored to where it was several years ago. The theme for this post is looking back while moving forward.

Over the past 10 to 15 years, I lived with a limited range of motion. This limitation came about so gradually that I cannot pinpoint the moment it started. For instance, when standing on one leg, I struggled to keep my balance. 

While walking, I took short steps because the ligaments, muscles, and tendons in my pelvis did not have much flexibility to allow a longer stride. I knew these were changes, but I could not say when they first happened.

Bending down to plug in an electrical appliance was a chore because my stomach and back muscles were weak. In addition, I became so accustomed to living with tension that my entire body was stiff. I had a stiff neck, stiff joints, stiff back. I constantly held my shoulders stiff and pointing up toward my ears. 

While driving, looking to my left or right had to be done with more effort because the muscles in my back and neck were so rigid. Living this way was the norm for me until I started following the Living PowerLife approach to health and wellness.

Today, I am happy to share that I no longer live with the rigidity, inflexibility, and weakness that I took for granted as part of living before. One example that led me to look for and observe these improvements happened just this past summer. 

During a camping trip, I had the chance to kayak for the first time. I canoed over the years and still do, but never kayaked and was excited that a family friend had an extra boat to share. While helping her take the kayaks off the top rack of her SUV, it became evident that I had more upper body strength. Since she was at least 30 years my junior and lived an active lifestyle, I was pleasantly surprised.

Once back home from camping, I decided to look for other signs that my physical health had improved. First, I checked my balance because this is what bothered me the most. As a child and young adult, I was very active and enjoyed athletics. 

Diminishing balance meant that I could not compete or even participate in sports like basketball, softball, tag football, or even boxing as well. After checking my balance, though, I found a great deal of improvement; I was back to when I was much younger.

Second, I checked my flexibility and found that I was much more able to do things that were a struggle before. Keep in mind that I have not really made a conscious effort to stretch or increase my flexibility. This improvement came about solely with me stretching before, during, and after my weightlifting workouts, bike riding, and running.

Third, bending down and doing things such as plugging in an electrical appliance was no problem. I did not even need to think about what to do. In fact, getting up and down from the floor is much easier again. 

By looking back over how much living and eating well has restored my health, I realize that part of claiming my power in my own life means that I take the time to consistently look back as I move forward. Look back to what was a struggle or difficult before, so that I can see how I am moving forward. Recognizing how I am moving forward helps to keep me motivated into the future.

From my PowerLife to yours,

 
Elandus

2012. All rights reserved.

Living In Reverse I

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Since around 2001, I have lived with what my doctor told me was the life-long effect of surviving a DVT (deep vein thrombosis) in my left leg. I had accepted this life-long effect and lived with it. Today, however I am totally surprised that this is no longer the case. The theme for this post is nothing is written in stone. 

I first noticed that my leg was no longer showing post DVT signs several months ago, but was hesitant to describe this in a post. My leg swelled often and my doctor, at the time, said this was something I would need to get used to. The swelling was not going to go away, and it had not gone away, until now. After observing this for months, I am ready to share and comfortable with attributing this good outcome to following the Living PowerLife approach to health and happiness. 

Back in 2000 or so, I had a major health catastrophe. I was being treated for lung congestion, which my doctor diagnosed as pneumonia. I was on antibiotics, really did not feel well, but was able to go about my daily obligations. Then one day I noticed that my left leg was much larger than my right from my groin down to my toes. Not long after that, my entire leg became shinny and had a reddish tint. I called my doctor and the message was to come to her office ASAP. 

I had a DVT and was admitted to the hospital. I was checked into the cardiac floor and not many people thought I would make it through the night. I did. I also became a novelty for the interns there because people seldom survive the condition that I had. My DVT was so large that part of it had broken off and traveled to my lung. Interns, nurses, doctors, came by my room to see the woman who beat the odds.

Once I was back on my feet (I was bedridden for 3 days. Hospitalized for 5) I saw that my left leg was still much larger than my right. In fact, I almost could not get my left leg into pants that fit otherwise. I asked my doctor during a check-up if my leg would go back to normal and she told me that I was just going to have to live with the swelling. She told me matter of fact with no room for maybe. 

She said that the leg will go down some, but that I was always going to have the problem of it swelling. Until recently, I treated what she told me as though it were written in stone. If I sat for a time, my leg would swell. If I stood or walked for a time, my leg would swell. To compensate, I propped my leg up whenever possible. This helped some. As years went by, the swelling leveled out so that my leg only swelled from the knee down, and was not as much a problem. That was then. 

Now, after following the Living PowerLife approach to health and happiness I can happily report that my leg no longer swells. I sit and write at the computer, and my leg does not swell. I run, walk, work out, and my leg does not swell. While my left leg is larger than my right, just as my left side is larger than my right, the swelling is gone. The only difference is Living PowerLife. 

I share this with you to remind you that nothing is written in stone in this world because the one thing you can count on is change. The question is which direction will the change take. Affecting the direction of the changes that come in your life is where you have control. You can find your optimal health through healthy eating, exercise, and meditation.

Remember: I am not a doctor, nor do I encourage anyone to stop taking medication, stop following your doctor's orders, start self-medicating, or start self-diagnosing. What I describe in my posts are what I experience and notice after changing how I live and eat.

From my PowerLife to yours,

2012. All rights reserved.

PowerLife Living: Swimining Uncharted Waters

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Recently, I have noticed several changes that I can share at this time. I cannot indicate whether these changes are negative or positive. They simply have occurred. Because I am following the Living PowerLife approach to better living exclusively and because I did not expect what has happened, the changes that I have noticed are important insight for anyone who is working to incorporate this approach into a healthier life. The overall theme of this post is continuing into the unknown.

For the majority of my adult life, I have engaged in consistent meditation. I first used meditation to recognize and try to understand some of the difficulties in the relationship that I had with my mother. At the time, I knew that she loved me, and there was no terrible abuse in my childhood. At the same time, though, I knew there was tension between us. 

Tension that I wanted to come to terms with so that I would not pass it on to my daughters. Meditation was how I succeeded. Meditation was key to learning that the relationship between my mother and me was, to use a Facebook description, complicated. This was also how I came to terms with the fact that parents often have difficulties in their relationships with their children.

Today, I have noticed that I cannot meditate the way that I have for most of my life. Every day, at my usual meditation time, I fall asleep at the beginning of my routine instead. The first few times, I thought that I was tired, but several weeks have gone by with the same result; I start my meditation routine only to awaken about 30 minutes later. Right now, I am not sure what to make of this.

In addition, I do not remember my dreams the way that I did. One consistency of sleep was that I remembered vivid dreams upon awakening. Maybe a few days would pass when I did not remember a dream, but that was not often. Constant dream recall was why I started keeping a dream log years ago. Not a person to believe in coincidence, I instinctively saw dream recall as a tool. 

Going back and reading my dream log was when I realized that there was useful insight into myself. This discipline helped me navigate very difficult emotional times in the past. However, today my dream recall consists of impressions or snapshot images at best. Most mornings I have no memory of dreaming at all.

Other than the fact that I miss being able to meditate, and I find sleep boring without remembering my dreams, I feel fine. Emotionally/mentally, I am the happiest and most focused than I have been for a long time. I do not have the feeling that someone, or something is missing in my life. I am not more invested in pleasing others than taking care of my needs. I feel good about my future.

Not remembering my dreams could mean that my subconscious is finished incorporating the new information that I was consciously accepting. If so, that is good and means an old chapter in my life is closed and a new one is beginning. I find not being able to meditate puzzling, though, and do not have any thoughts about why this is the case.

I do remember that when I first started meditating, letting my mind wander uncensored was difficult. I also remember that I would fall asleep when I meditated in bed, which is why I sit. In the past, I stopped meditating for short periods. In retrospect, each time that I decided to stop, I was drawn into to destructive waters. Since I did not decide to stop meditating, I am not sure what is coming next.

Only time will tell what all these changes mean. Only time will tell if I will start back remembering dreams and be able to meditate again. Right now, I am in uncharted waters. I do know that nothing is coincidental, and my assessments tell me that I am still moving in a good direction.

From my PowerLife to yours,

2012. All rights reserved.

End of Summer Thoughts: 2012

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Now that summer is officially over and a new season is on the horizon, I did what I usually do at this time of year--make assessments in my life. Following are some of my thoughts on how the Living PowerLife approach to happiness and health has changed me for the better. The overall theme for this post is finding Power by breaking through life-long barriers.

Before I could begin to think about the full effect of the Living PowerLife approach, I had to revisit two areas of my past. First, I had to examine where I was about 3 years ago when I first came to Boston, MA. Second, I had to acknowledge the actions and decisions that brought me to such a negative point. I will not spend a great deal of energy today describing where I was and how I got there. That has been shared in previous posts. These two links are where you can read about that time: Your Living PowerLife Springboard--Spiritual and Welcome! Bienvenue!.

That established, what I have to share today falls under three categories: physical, mental, and spiritual.

Physical: I will start with the obvious. I have lost weight. How much? I do not know. Enough to need an entire new wardrobe starting with my underwear. Part of deciding to change how I feel and live includes not focusing on how much I weigh. Been there and done that. 

Been there when I trotted to the doctor's office every month to stand on a scale while anxiously awaiting the pronouncement that would either label me a success--I had lost weight, or a failure--I had not. Gone are those days. Done that agonizing before deciding to eat every morsel of food. Done the psychological self-flagellation because I was not the size someone else had claimed for me. Gone are those days.

Instead, I stay in constant contact with how I feel in my body. I consider how my body functions every day when determining whether I am moving in the direction that I want. The results have been fantastic. I am stronger, have more endurance, and I am far more flexible than before.

My body has more definition because my muscle tone is better than at least 10 years ago. In a sense, I have turned back the clock through exercise, better eating/sleeping habits, removing stressful people and situations when possible, redirecting my thoughts and energy when necessary, and meditation. 

Mental: Again, I will start with the obvious. My mental attitude is better than it has been for at least 20 years. I can give you an example. Recently, my computer got a virus, AGAIN, that completely wiped out my hard drive. Even my tech guy who fixes computers for a living said what happened to my computer was ''weired''.

Now, I could very easily have gone down a self-defeating path of blame, anger, and pity. In fact, I am almost sure that I would have done so in the past. This time though, I made the conscious choice to focus only on what I could do. The results are I know even more about computers. Now, instead of having one, I will soon have access to three computers when everything is complete.

My mental attitude is crucial to being able to get and maintain focus while working out. I am an extrovert to the core. I love being around people, and get energized by engaging with people. This has often been my downfall in the past because I became distracted by what other people were thinking or doing too easily. I became engaged with other people too quickly. 

While I am still the ultimate extrovert, I have learned how to manage my inclination better. I am no longer distracted as much by the presence of others, and this frees more time and energy to focus on myself and what I need to do. The results are that I break new weightlifting barriers every month or so and I currently lift more weight than I did in my 30's.

Spiritually: This aspect is less easy to describe. My spirituality is the most private part of my life. My spirituality is also what grounds me and is how I get and maintain a positive outlook. For decades my spiritual life has been enriched through focused meditation (to be covered this fall), dream interpretation, and prayer. The difference now is that, through following the Living PowerLife approach to health, I no longer have the need to be accepted by a religious group.

My spiritual connection is not determined by others. My spiritual connection is determined by how I develop my relationship with God and the Universe. Coming to this realization is nothing short of a miracle in my life. You see, as far back as I can remember, I have struggled with being accepted by some religious group or another.

As far back as I can remember, I have been told that I was not good enough by religion. Not searching for inclusion has allowed me to redirect the energy that I was wasting on trying to be where I did not need to be, and use it to fully explore my spiritual life, code of ethics, and relationship to the rest of creation. 

In summary, while there are particulars in my life that I would like to improve (a larger bank account, for instance), I feel very good about the direction my life is heading, and look forward to my favorite time of year--fall.

From my PowerLife to yours,

Elandus

2012. All rights reserved.

Mid Summer Thoughts: 2012

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Now that summer is half over, I am taking this time to evaluate where I am in the goals that I set at the end of spring. These goals involve my physical, mental, and spiritual well-being. In this post, I will describe how the process of obtaining my goals has been to date. The overall theme is leaving space.

Mid summer 2012

Physical: this area has been the most difficult to manage which surprises me. In summary, the goals that I set for the summer are: 

• Increase gym workouts from 3-4 to 5-6 days every week
• Increase gym time from 1 to 1.5 hours each day
• Eat at least 1 meal consisting only of raw food every day
• Increase massages from occasionally to 3 times a month

I increased my days and time because this was something that I planned to do all along. I changed my diet and increased the number of massages because I wanted to explore how they would affect my endurance and flexibility respectively.

To date, I have found getting to the gym and going through my regular routine an extra 2 to 3 days to be a challenge. This means that with the exception of 2 weeks, I have kept my goal. This has been difficult to accept because in body building, I have met every goal that I set for myself in the past. 

Even when I trained to run in a marathon, which at the time was the most I had ever challenged my body, I met every goal that I set. I am motivated, still. My mental attitude is fine. My health couldn't be better. Even though, I took a break 2 weeks in a row. My mind searched for reasons why getting to the gym and completing my workout had become more difficult.

Finally, while studying for my physical fitness trainer certification, I realized that the breaks were necessary for my body to recover. Otherwise, I'm sure I would have suffered an injury. I know this because my body showed signs of becoming stressed. For example, I noticed that the weights that I lifted felt much heavier than usual. I experienced soreness after working out. I also needed more rest during the day, and I wasn't  experiencing my post-workout boost that I so enjoyed. I decided that my body was telling me that it needed space to adjust to the changes. 

In other words, because my diet had even less fat, and I increased the level of exercise, my body needed to take a few days to refine processing food to fuel. Because I had not varied from changing my diet, in fact some days I had more than one raw meal substitute, my body had to catch up at the molecular level. This is a good thing, although a bit difficult to experience. This is how real change occurs.

To combat what I felt, I made sure that I got plenty of water, sleep (at least 6 hours uninterrupted every night), and if I had to, I got a little sleep during the day. I did not do that often, though, because I really hated sleeping during the day and this can interfere with sleeping at night. I also found that massage therapy was very helpful with my tight, sore muscles and stiff shoulder. 

Mental: I have been successful in mentally letting go of my belongings. I have also succeeded in letting go of a long held perception. This was not easy, still, but it was necessary for my peace of mind. As I continued to let go, I found that focusing on what I did at the gym was even stronger. This was letting me know, through practical application, just how much mental distraction drained my energy, and kept me from fully focusing on my goals. An important example to hold on to, is it not?

Part of letting go is creating the space for your mind to find a way to incorporate your new emotional reaction into daily life. This is where the function of dreams come into play. Dreams are valuable in helping your mind process new information and feelings. I share this very recent example to illustrate how this works. If the following does not make sense, I do hope that you will be patient with me. This is the first time that I have shared my dream in such a public way.

About a week ago, I had a dream that I needed to urinate in a major way. I was not at home and the stall that was available was very nasty--full to overflowing onto the floor with feces. There was no way that I could use the stall or toilet. Some of you may have had dreams like this when your bladder is full. This is one way that you deal with the conflicting realities of wanting to continue to sleep, while needing to wake up and relieve yourself at the same time. 

This dream was different because when I woke up, I realized that I didn't need to use the bathroom. At first, this was confusing because I had never had a dream like that when I didn't actually need to use the bathroom. Consequently, I searched for possible reasons for having this odd dream. Still in bed, I checked my physical state. Physically, I felt fine, and had not been dealing with any challenges over the past few days that would lead to me having the dream. When I checked my mental state, I then remembered that as I fell asleep that night a particular church from my past as a minister was on my mind. 

I remembered how much I believed back then that I needed to be recognized by the pastor and congregation to be valid. I wrongly linked having the stamp of approval from a religious organization to my credibility as a minister. During this time in my life, I put little energy toward understanding and fulfilling my call from God and a great deal of energy toward finding a place where I could function as a minister. That struggle now over, I remembered thinking about how good it felt to be free as I relaxed in my bed that night. 

Also on my mind was the time that I was first called by a group of people to be their pastor. I remembered the ceremony, where they officially claimed me as their pastor, and how much more that moment meant to me. To this day, even though we no longer meet, I still live to honor the faith they showed in my call to ministry. This is when the dream that I had the night before made sense. 

In my dream, I was finally accepting and coming to terms with the fact that for years--during seminary, after seminary--I spent far too much energy, one minute was too much, trying to walk into a stifling stall and sit on a crock of shit when I didn't need to. All I needed was to listen to what my heart was telling me, and live to become the person I was meant to be.

Spiritual: I really haven't given this one a great deal of energy because my decision in this area was made several months ago. All that was left was to consciously incorporate the decision into my life so that it became an attitude. 

Organized religion, especially for me, especially for women is, at best, counter to what I believe and to what I hear God telling me in my heart. At its worst, religion is toxic. Any doubt that I may have had about this was erased last fall.

I had the opportunity to go back to a religious institution and revisit people there from my past. What I saw and experienced was not pretty. In addition, I caught a glimpse of the person that I had to be to survive that setting as long as I did. In my life today, the people there, many were there years ago when I was, became just another clear example of how much organized religion is a negative force in our communities and lives.

The only further comments that I can add about this area of my life are these:

• If God is everywhere, why do we need to sit, stand, kneel, in a particular structure and hear the monologue of a certain type of leader to experience God's presence? 

We DON'T. 

Yet, some of us still do.

• If God is love, why is it okay for some people to condemn and blame others?

It ISN'T. 

Yet some of us do so even at the foot of the cross.

• If God is all seeing, how can it be okay to keep our mouths and eyes shut when people are used or abused?

It ISN'T. 

Yet, we ignore this on the way to our religious institutions.

• If God is all loving, what gives us the liberty to kill, insult, hate, beat, abandon, ostracize, gossip about, alienate... each other in the name of some religion?

It ISN'T. 

Yet religious institutions are founded on scapegoating--the exclusion of some to define membership.

Bottom line, I'm learning more about what motivates, immobilizes, mobilizes, stifles, or invigorates me. This means that I am becoming even more able to recognize the people and places I should avoid and those I should embrace. Sometimes the learning process is easy, sometimes difficult. Always, it is important.

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Update: 8/12/12

Today was the first time that I felt the post-workout boost that I have missed since starting the changes described above. Today was also the first day that I completed my training routine without excessive effort. 

These two things lead me to think that I have rounded a physical corner. In other words, my body appears to have found a balance between the eating changes and the training increase. I'm quite happy about this.

From my PowerLife to yours,

 

Elandus

Early Summer Thoughts: 2012

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At the end of spring 2012 after meditating and listening for my guidance, I made several decisions. My decisions involved several aspects of living into my Power: physical, mental, and spiritual. The overall theme of this post is stretching without breaking.

Early summer 2012

Physical: I decided to eat at least one meal a day that was made up of only raw food such as fruit, vegetables, oats, or nuts. I kicked up my gym time to include at least 5 days a week for a minimum of 1.5 hours. I increased my massages to a minimum of 3 times a month. 

Mental: I decided to stop thinking about some of the things that have been on my mind for at least 6 months. To stop, meant that I had to mentally let go of items that meant a great deal to me. Belongings from my past that cannot be replaced. Items from my history that can be replaced. This was not easy to do. In fact, though less and less, I still find this one difficult.

Spiritual: I decided to accept the fact that organized religion runs counter to my spirituality and in direct opposition to what God has called me to do as a minister. This has been an ongoing struggle for most of my adult life, and all of my professional life until now. I am at peace with ending the conflict, and I no longer want or need to be connected to a religious organization. 

At the beginning of summer--June, I began implementing my decisions. Now, as I move into August, I find the struggles that were most difficult at first, mentally and emotionally letting go of my past belongings, are not as prevalent. If I am meant to keep them, the Universe will show me the way. The decision that I thought would be the easiest to implement, bumping up my workout time, is becoming more difficult. 

Perhaps I am hitting a wall, or perhaps my body is responding in a way that in time will reveal a difference that I do not yet know about. Perhaps the combination of switching to raw food regularly and more gym time is taxing in a way that I don't yet recognize. 

The good news, once I get to the gym, I have no difficulty with my workout. I also have no difficulty staying on my old routine of working out at least 3 times a week. Consequently, I am not loosing ground. I am, however, finding motivation to be fleeting at times. Nothing to stop me, yet, but fleeting.

From my PowerLife to yours,

2012

Elandus

2012. All rights reserved.

Learning to PowerLife--Mental Attitude

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Chaka Kahn has gotten the attention of the media recently because her healthier life-style is working. In interviews she describes initially following a juice fast for several months, and then eliminating meat and dairy from her diet. She also shares what motivated her to start turning her life around from living with type-two diabetes, obesity, and high blood pressure to a healthier way. Reporters quote her as saying that being responsible for rearing her granddaughter was her main motivation to change in the beginning.

Her journey toward better health is important to us for two main reasons. First, her story highlights the importance of mental attitude when working to recognize and claim your Power. Second, having a strong reason that your mind can hold on to is crucial to initial success when you are working to become free of life-long habits.

Try this simple experiment. Tomorrow as you start your day, tell yourself: I am beautiful. Life is precious. Everyone I meet can see my positive light. These are not meant to be platitudes, so please take them seriously. Know that the three statements are true in your heart without question or exception, no matter what happens throughout the day. Later, in the evening, make an assessment to see if you notice any difference.

The first time that I did this exercise I was shocked at just how different my day seemed. People smiled more than usual. I had several short, pleasant exchanges with strangers. In addition, at the end of my day, I felt energized and relaxed rather than overwhelmed and exhausted.

I was also surprised, as I made the conscious effort to keep my positive mental attitude throughout the day, at how many negative thoughts I had in a 24 hour period. I was surprised at how many times people with negative comments or behavior got and held my attention. This is when I understood on a practical level how important having and keeping a positive mental attitude was to living a healthier, happier life.

Living your PowerLife means refocusing your mind so that you can find and hold on to the attitude that lets you see what is positive, strong, and honest within you and every interaction that you have. Once you have refocused your mind, you can then recognize when you are facing negativity, weakness, and dishonesty in yourself and the interactions that you have with others. Knowing the difference on a conscious level helps all of us adhere to the people, places, and actions that lead to success while we avoid the rest. I will share some information about myself as an example.

For years I had the mental attitude that allowed me only to see friends or foes. Everything was about me, and I quickly assessed whether people were friends or foes based on my perception of them. If I determined that they were friends, I would relax and spend less time focusing on what they did or said.

If I decided that they were foes, however, I became vigilant and focused a great deal of time and energy toward understanding or countering what they said or did. I lived by what some people, including myself at the time, called the King of the Hill mentality. With this approach to life, there was only one king atop each hill and I was determined to be at the top. Sounds crazy right? 

Well, it was crazy and that mental attitude brought more craziness and drama in my life than I could possibly handle. You see, when we look for fights behind every curtain, that's exactly what we find; fights and people who like to fight. It wasn't until I felt that the world was against me, and I became weary of the fighting and the angry people that I looked inside for guidance on how I approached life. There were several things working against me and they all came from within.

First, in my mind, everything was about me; there was no room for the possibility that events beyond me were affecting what I was experiencing.

Second, I left no room for the possibility that I might be wrong; once I made up my mind, the deal was done even when everything that I heard and saw contradicted my decision.

Third, there was no room for the possibility that some people change; in my few minutes of assessment, if I decided someone was a friend, that stuck no matter what happened later to challenge my decision.

Fourth, I left no room for the possibility that people were not always honest; because I was honest almost to a fault, I believed what other people said with little question.

Fifth, I left no room for the possibility that not everyone had my set of morals; I lived believing that if I would not behave a certain way, the people in my circle of friends, family, and colleagues would not behave that way either.

The key word in the above list is possibility. I left nothing to chance in my mind at the same time that everything was left to chance. I was naive enough to firmly believe that I knew. I knew who was my friend. I knew who was my foe. I knew who loved me. I knew whom I loved. In retrospect, I had no clue.

I had no clue about who had my back and who did not. I had no clue about what might happen if I stopped and listened to my inner guidance on this issue. Beyond my immediate family, I had no clue about who loved me and who did not. In addition, I certainly did not know the person whom I loved at the time. The result; I was blown left, right, up, down like a leaf. My life was in the hands of chance or anyone who presented well, and that was not good for me.

In the Welcome post I introduced the concept of switching your thought process from binary to triad. I wrote that part of claiming and living your Power included turning away from thinking in yes/no, right/wrong terms solely, and toward yes/no/progression. 

When we think in binary form, we see black or white, good or bad, friend or foe. There are times when binary thinking is necessary. Sometimes an action is simply wrong, and this is so because of the effects the action has on others. Many times, though, binary thinking blinds us and keeps us from bringing what is possible to life. This is why I now think mainly in yes/no/progression terms.

This means that when I am assessing my life or simply making a decision about what to eat, I first ask, is this something that I want? If the answer is yes I then consider possible effects if I follow through. In other words, will the effects of what I have decided that I want to do put me closer to where I want to go in my life? 

If the answer is still yes then I follow through. This is where possibilities that I may not experience come to fruition. Doors open. People come into my life. I experience spiritual, physical, or mental growth that I would not have otherwise.

Conversely, if I decide that the effects will not bring me closer to my goal, then I examine why I want to do something that puts me at at odds with what I want to accomplish in my life. Again, what is just possible becomes real because self-exploration on the issue brings about a deeper understanding of what motivates me to act.

A quick example: An opportunity to learn to tango comes my way. I first need to decide if this is something that I want to do. The answer is yes. Next, I need to determine if taking dance lessons will move me in the direction that I want to go which is living a healthier, fuller life. The answer is still yes. I follow through and take the lessons, and what was once only possible becomes real. I meet people that I would not have met. My body is more flexible than before. I move with even more confidence and fluidity.

If the answer is no taking lessons will not bring me closer to what I want to accomplish, I explore why I want to do something that counters obtaining my goals. I do this through meditation, and possibly dream interpretation. In the process, what is only possible becomes real. I may learn that I am very uncomfortable with one to one interaction. On exploring this about myself, perhaps I learn that I was betrayed in some way that was connected to intimacy. This is all conjecture, but I hope you can see that my yes/no/progression approach to life creates win/win choices. Either way you win because you become a better person.

Let's begin exploring your mental attitude.

Take one week to keep track of every time you have a negative thought about yourself. Forget about what you think of other people  or what they may think about you. Right now, just keep track of the times that you tell yourself that you shouldn't, can't, won't, haven't, will never, don't have, won't have, can't stop, won't stop.... Write down what you say to yourself verbatim, and briefly describe the situation you are in at the time. If you are aware of other people around you, make a note of who they are and what relationship they represent to you.

Include your feelings as well. When you look in the mirror, jot down how you feel about your looks. What emotions do you feel when you see your reflection? Do you smile? Frown? When you look at a picture of yourself, what is your reaction? At work, try to keep track of when you admonish yourself, or tell yourself that you are not good enough, or compare yourself to another.

As with all of the things that you write, keep them private. This is information about you for you that will be important to having more insight into what motivates you and what gets in your way later on.

If you find this blog helpful, I ask that you let others know by using the google and Facebook links to tell your friends. Thank you.


From my PowerLife to Yours,

2012

Elandus

2012. All rights reserved.